Camp: Rite of Passage, Torture, or Both?

This week marks the first time my kids have ever truly experienced "summer camp".  I've always been home in the summer, so there really was no need to send them off for the day - that's what Summer Rec (3 hours in the am) was for!

On Friday, kid #3 learned that he too, was going to camp...finally!  His chance to be just like one of the big kids!  He wouldn't believe anyone at first - he's never been able to do the things his sisters do...but when we finally convinced him he was signed up, you could just see he was ready to jump out of his skin with excitement.  Needless to say, I was relieved...and happy I wouldn't have to drag him there kicking and screaming (yep, this is a bit of "foreshadowing").

So on Monday, as I drove through camp to drop my 3 campers off, (girls = grumbling, boy = grinning from ear to ear) I kept my fingers crossed we'd have no "mishaps" as they departed the car.  Kids 1, 2 & 3 hopped out of the car like they were old pro's, and I drove away in a great mood.

Fast forward to Monday night...kid #3 starts asking if he has to go back and repeating that he misses me a lot during the day.  Ok, I can deal with this...I tell him it's ok to miss me because I miss him, too - but he's having a lot of fun and it won't be long before I go to pick him up.  He seems a little comforted by this.

Tuesday am drop off again...they all pile right out of the car again...whew.  Off to work I go.

Tuesday eve - I'm working late, but get a cryptic message from Mike that he's having to work kid #3 hard to get his mind back into going to camp.  Uh oh.  Hope he can work some magic...

Wednesday morning.  "Mom, do I have to go?  I really miss you."  "Mom, I don't want to go.  Don't make me go."  "Mom - don't make me go to camp!"   Repeat.  A lot.  Crap.  As I drive through camp, the pleas are becoming more and more pathetic and the pitch is getting more and more feverish...there are a few tears by now...and as I get to the drop off zone, the girls pile out, but there's no moving kid #3.  He's still buckled in.  As I reach to release the buckle, the pleading turns to panic and he grabs on to the door handle...this kid isn't budging.  The poor counselor doesn't know what to do...I wind up getting out of the car and removing him myself...he's clutching to me like it's life or death...I feel myself getting really worked up - Do I bring him back with me?  Do I walk him over myself?  Agh!

Finally I decide that I've just got to leave him - If I relent and let him come with me, the repercussions could be worse than anything else.  So I pry him off of me, hand him over to the counselor, turn and practically run to the car and take off...hearing his cries of "MOM!"  "NO!" in my head and I feel like the WORST.  MOM. EVER.  I've just abandoned my kid.  He'll be scarred forever. "Mommy Dearest" has nothing on me.

My guilt lasted for about an hour and a half...until Mike responded to the email I sent to him, pleading for him to tell me NOT to go back and pick him up.  Mike's always the rock...and after he reinforced what I was thinking, I felt better.  Still guilty, but much better.  We thought it'd be good to reward kid #3's "bravery" by picking him up a bit earlier and treating him to a "Daddy/Bubby Lunch"...which seemed to work wonders.  I told Mike to call me when he picked him up to let me know how he was....I just wanted to make sure I hadn't totally destroyed the kid and that he was ok.  I was informed that he was just fine...with camouflage-painted cheeks, and the only mom-guilt part of the day is that he didn't go in the pool because he was "too sad to swim".  Alright.  I can deal with that.

Last night I had a long talk with the Bub as he was snuggled up in his bed.  We talked about camp, why he had a hard time going, again - that it was ok to miss me, and I told him I was very proud of him for being a brave big boy and going to camp when he didn't want to.  He still wasn't keen on going again...so I told him there were only 2 more days before it was finished - and it was as if I had said the magic words...ONLY TWO MORE DAYS!  He must have asked/confirmed with me 3-4 more times that it was only 2 days...

This morning was much better than yesterday - he only asked if he could stay with me once or twice.  I had a nice little talk with kid #1, and how she needed to step up and help her brother if he has another meltdown...all went swimmingly well until we got to the camp entrance...then he started in with the "I don't want to go" pleas...NUTS!  I didn't hesitate at all this time, though, and got him right out of the car myself.  Kid #1 stuck to him like glue which helped...and I only heard him call out my name once.  Still not easy to drive away, but better than yesterday.  One can only hope it gets easier each time...we'll see what tomorrow brings.  Or what happens when *gulp* Pre-K starts...