Camp: Rite of Passage, Torture, or Both?

This week marks the first time my kids have ever truly experienced "summer camp".  I've always been home in the summer, so there really was no need to send them off for the day - that's what Summer Rec (3 hours in the am) was for!

On Friday, kid #3 learned that he too, was going to camp...finally!  His chance to be just like one of the big kids!  He wouldn't believe anyone at first - he's never been able to do the things his sisters do...but when we finally convinced him he was signed up, you could just see he was ready to jump out of his skin with excitement.  Needless to say, I was relieved...and happy I wouldn't have to drag him there kicking and screaming (yep, this is a bit of "foreshadowing").

So on Monday, as I drove through camp to drop my 3 campers off, (girls = grumbling, boy = grinning from ear to ear) I kept my fingers crossed we'd have no "mishaps" as they departed the car.  Kids 1, 2 & 3 hopped out of the car like they were old pro's, and I drove away in a great mood.

Fast forward to Monday night...kid #3 starts asking if he has to go back and repeating that he misses me a lot during the day.  Ok, I can deal with this...I tell him it's ok to miss me because I miss him, too - but he's having a lot of fun and it won't be long before I go to pick him up.  He seems a little comforted by this.

Tuesday am drop off again...they all pile right out of the car again...whew.  Off to work I go.

Tuesday eve - I'm working late, but get a cryptic message from Mike that he's having to work kid #3 hard to get his mind back into going to camp.  Uh oh.  Hope he can work some magic...

Wednesday morning.  "Mom, do I have to go?  I really miss you."  "Mom, I don't want to go.  Don't make me go."  "Mom - don't make me go to camp!"   Repeat.  A lot.  Crap.  As I drive through camp, the pleas are becoming more and more pathetic and the pitch is getting more and more feverish...there are a few tears by now...and as I get to the drop off zone, the girls pile out, but there's no moving kid #3.  He's still buckled in.  As I reach to release the buckle, the pleading turns to panic and he grabs on to the door handle...this kid isn't budging.  The poor counselor doesn't know what to do...I wind up getting out of the car and removing him myself...he's clutching to me like it's life or death...I feel myself getting really worked up - Do I bring him back with me?  Do I walk him over myself?  Agh!

Finally I decide that I've just got to leave him - If I relent and let him come with me, the repercussions could be worse than anything else.  So I pry him off of me, hand him over to the counselor, turn and practically run to the car and take off...hearing his cries of "MOM!"  "NO!" in my head and I feel like the WORST.  MOM. EVER.  I've just abandoned my kid.  He'll be scarred forever. "Mommy Dearest" has nothing on me.

My guilt lasted for about an hour and a half...until Mike responded to the email I sent to him, pleading for him to tell me NOT to go back and pick him up.  Mike's always the rock...and after he reinforced what I was thinking, I felt better.  Still guilty, but much better.  We thought it'd be good to reward kid #3's "bravery" by picking him up a bit earlier and treating him to a "Daddy/Bubby Lunch"...which seemed to work wonders.  I told Mike to call me when he picked him up to let me know how he was....I just wanted to make sure I hadn't totally destroyed the kid and that he was ok.  I was informed that he was just fine...with camouflage-painted cheeks, and the only mom-guilt part of the day is that he didn't go in the pool because he was "too sad to swim".  Alright.  I can deal with that.

Last night I had a long talk with the Bub as he was snuggled up in his bed.  We talked about camp, why he had a hard time going, again - that it was ok to miss me, and I told him I was very proud of him for being a brave big boy and going to camp when he didn't want to.  He still wasn't keen on going again...so I told him there were only 2 more days before it was finished - and it was as if I had said the magic words...ONLY TWO MORE DAYS!  He must have asked/confirmed with me 3-4 more times that it was only 2 days...

This morning was much better than yesterday - he only asked if he could stay with me once or twice.  I had a nice little talk with kid #1, and how she needed to step up and help her brother if he has another meltdown...all went swimmingly well until we got to the camp entrance...then he started in with the "I don't want to go" pleas...NUTS!  I didn't hesitate at all this time, though, and got him right out of the car myself.  Kid #1 stuck to him like glue which helped...and I only heard him call out my name once.  Still not easy to drive away, but better than yesterday.  One can only hope it gets easier each time...we'll see what tomorrow brings.  Or what happens when *gulp* Pre-K starts...

Heavy rain, painful toes & bears...oh my!

After the events of this past weekend and the torrential, unrelenting rain, my planned long run was put on the back burner.  I did manage to get over to the NH track to get a quick 3 miler in with all 3 kids in tow - figuring that it's fenced in, where could they go?  Glad I didn't encounter the black bear that everyone else saw that morning on the property...

I would have liked to get my 16 miles in Sunday afternoon/evening, but it was just too nice for Mike to be back home and not be there, too.  I figured I'd have to log something of a longer nature in the beginning of this week, so I'd try to head out a bit early Monday evening and then try to time it so I'd run (no pun intended) back to Base Camp with the "Fun Runners" that meet and run together every Monday.  Unfortunately I was about 1/2 mile off my calculations (wanted to get in 10, got up to 9.5) and was about 40 seconds per mile faster than I predicted (WOOHOO!!!) so I got back ahead of everyone else.  It's very strange - as I was on my run, I felt like I just couldn't get into a good rhythm...like I was a bit awkward...but I think it's because I was running faster (considerably, to me) than usual, but my heart rate was staying low...definitely a step in the right direction!

 

BUT....of course since I was feeling so great...the achilles heel of my running life has flared up again...only this time it's on the other foot.  Grrrr.  I let myself think for only a second during that run how great it was that my right foot was holding up well and I hadn't had any issues other than the shin pain a few weeks back.  D'oh!  Kiss of death!  Now my left foot is painful in the same area as where my right foot had issues (stupid longer middle toe!), but this time it's more acute, rather than a diffuse discomfort.  So, I'm enlisting the services of Advil and ice on a regular basis to see if I can get rid of this nonsense.  Hopefully this will resolve in the next few days and I won't miss much of my training.  FINGERS CROSSED!

On another note, returning to Base Camp and meeting up with the fun runners for a few recovery beers and some socialization made it a really great night.  Thanks to Julie for organizing - great idea, great people, great company...can't go wrong!

How will you be remembered?

On another one of my longer runs last night, I had plenty of time for my mind to wander...thinking of my husband's grandfather (as I'm sure you may have read about in any one of the three blogs posted by Mike, his brother Eric and sister, Amy) and not to sound too corny, the "circle of life".  How do we want to leave our mark on the world?

As we lose those close to us, be it members of our family, close friends, or people who are very much like family, we automatically go back to memories we have of that person- how they've played a roll in our lives, maybe even how we could  have improved the relationship, funny recollections...but especially their legacy.  There are some who leave us  perhaps followed by a procession of adoring fans, maybe first in line of a myriad of firetrucks, police cars or interred with military honors...some may leave us with very little fanfare - but they've all spent their time among us...

My point is, no matter who you are or what you do, you impact others on this earth just by the very fact you exist.  I know I'm not alone when I wonder what it'll be like when I pass - will there be a lot of friends along with my family to celebrate my life?  (I'd much rather look at it that way).  Will I have made a big or small difference in the lives of anyone around me?  Will I leave a lasting legacy, perhaps through multiple generations?  I know of a few individuals (who shall not be named here!) who have things very much planned out...and have already visualized their lives all the way up through their deaths.  I'm not sure if most people have done the same...I haven't been too detailed in my thoughts about this, but seeing/hearing about someone you know facing the end of their life can certainly get you thinking a bit more in depth on the subject.

No one I've ever known will ever be forgotten - every now and then something will pop up that reminds me of someone in particular.  It might be subtle, or sometimes very powerful - I might laugh out loud remembering a funny story, or turn wistful when I'm reminded of how I used to feel around that person...I hope I live my life leaving good memories for all who surround me...and truly hope they all will remember me and celebrate my life when I'm gone.

Mission accomplished?

So last Sunday marks the first time I've run more distance in one day than I have in the past 11 years.  And I've got the sore muscles to prove it.

I'm really starting to question my sanity in deciding to do this whole marathon thing again...we'll see what happens as the long run mileage continues to creep up.  I just hope my internet doesn't crap out again just before I need to map out my route...I could take up this whole blog entry ranting and complaining about our service provider, but I think I'll save that for another time.  Let's just say they've had to pay a visit to my house upwards of 15-20 times to fix the same problem.

Anyway, we had a nice weekend - Saturday was the soccer finals (unfortunately, we lost - read the recap HERE), then 2 pool parties - my kids were in heaven.  I stopped in The Sneaker Factory in between and picked up a pair of Saucony's...let's just say I certainly didn't pick them for looks and the only saving grace is that they aren't red.  I might be mistaken for Ronald McDonald otherwise.

So after party #2, we go right home, get the kids cleaned up and off to bed...and I'm ready to prep for the 15 miler the following morning (5 am wake up)...uh oh...NO INTERNET.  Funny how I've become so ridiculously dependent on mapmyrun.com to plan my route to the nth degree...so I spend the rest of the evening continuously fiddling/checking/cursing the black cable box that I really, really just wanted to throw out the window.

Well, there was no fixing the thing...I gave up and went to bed...got about 2 hours worth before kid #3 woke up crying because he's got "boogies"...tough to breathe when you're completely stuffed up.  Repeat 4 times.  5 am comes really early.

I get up, get clothing together, find my shoes, charge the garmin, put on the HR monitor...where's my iPod?  Nowhere to be found.  I guess I could live without it...so I give up looking after a while concluding that this just isn't going to be the greatest morning.  Drink some coffee, eat some breakfast...fill up 2 water bottles and find my gu...find the iPod (YAY!)...and finally hit the road an hour later (1/2 hour later than planned).

Up to the Columbia Trail I go...at least I know it's all marked out up there and once I figure out how far it is to/from, should be easy to run exactly 15...I'm actually feeling pretty good despite wearing my old shoes (no way I'm going to risk running long distance in the new ones!) - my right shin only hurts for the first 2 miles, my feet feel fine and I feel pretty energetic all things considered.  It's almost exactly 2.5 miles to the trail, so all I have to do is go another 5 miles then turn around...and it was great because I saw quite a few familiar faces out there...which always is a great pick-me-up.  As part of my training, I monitor my heart rate, and was surprised to see it was in the steady low 150's almost the whole time...

FYI, there are only 2 drawbacks to running on the Columbia Trail...no bathrooms and LOTS of poison ivy.

After a brief (but very necessary) pit-stop to a porta potty in the parking lot at the beginning of the trail, and a brief stretch, I headed home...by this time my right hamstring was seemingly getting tighter and my feet were tired...but my pace didn't slow even after climbing a few hills and before I knew it, I was trotting up my driveway.  Sunday morning mission accomplished...exact needed mileage in the books, AND the rest of the day to do whatever I wanted.   Well, whatever I wanted with kid #1 and kid #3 tagging along.  Long gone are the days of marathon training sans kids.  I can't really even remember what it was like...

Next up:  Rediculous Relay...hoping to cover 7-12 miles (I'm supposed to do a 7 miler as my long run anyway) THEN 17 the following weekend. Maybe I'll hit the "wall" just as I arrive home.  Perfect!